Sheena Time!

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Whad-a-ya do with a girl like Sheena Johnson?

Kills her dad, loves her mom, makes a bomb

Throws it thru the door of the boy’s locker room

Number one in class, will kick your ass

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Whad-a-ya do with a girl like that?

I’m living next door, doing a chore

Suddenly there she is in the driveway

Wearing a shredded washrag, calling me a fuckin’ fag

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My God, what am I supposed to do?

Here’s the girl next door making me her bottom floor

I’m working hard to be to be to be a man

She laughs & dares me to jump outta the frying pan

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The towers collapse in two-thousand-&-one

There’s Sheena standing there ~ the daughter of a machine gun

Stands there in my driveway as if the Princess of Mars

Enlists in the army & I follow, my eyes full of stars!

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Afghaneeland

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Vagina Envy

vagina_cosmica_by_nietoshka-d386efh

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Yes Sir, the villagers rebuild the mosque

With brick & mortar payed-for by the U.S. Army

Under the supervision of Col. Sheena Johnson

With Taliban breath on the backs of their necks

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Her Taliban-fodder fiancee mixes the mortar

He & his fellow villagers lay the brick

Too soon, Sheena’s husband Habibullah is wanted dead or alive

In Haqqanni Network lairs high n’ low over Pakistan way

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There’s a price on his head for lovin’ the beautiful colonel

Taliban bullets sing all around him, his old Taliban friends

Try with flaming sticks to burn out the eyes of his little brother

But in the nick of time Sheena kills them all

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One of her tricks is to place 3 arrows

Against the taunt string of her bow held horizontally

Only Ollie’s bountiful sister-in-law can do it just right

She pulls the string way back under her chin

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Before the arrows hit their mark she does it again

like she is the daughter of a machine gun

& that’s exactly what she is

So years ago she had to kill her father too

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She has no choice, faced with such fearsome vagina envy

Her sleek arms get oh so sore but she doesn’t give up

She throws off her worn & faded yellow polk-a-dot burka

100 extra arrows in the quiver a hanging on her back

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The village is surrounded by 100 & one Taliban

Nobody knows how she does it

At point-blank range the Talibanees jerk & they miss

At any range they fall in love and they miss!

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shanna_jungle_by_marcio_abreu_by_tony058-d2zhz6b

The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

Rawclyde!

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Art

http://nietoshka.deviantart.com/gallery/#

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Text

Copyright Clyde Collins 2014

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The Legend of Colonel Sheena Johnson

Sheena with bow & arrow

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by Rawclyde!

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One girl-soldier on my crew fought off

5 wanna-be rapists in her platoon

Killed them & did not get caught

Her blood-lust knew no bounds when it came to the Taliban

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500 mysteriously disappeared while she ranged around

Out of uniform for one month in northeast Afghanistan

After which she was promoted to Colonel

This included 3 Waziristan villages that she leveled

(Nobody knows how and, anyway, it’s just a rumor)

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She was assigned to nurture an ill-conceived outpost

Deep in the mountains, so deep it scratched the back

Of Pakistan & consequently was doomed until

She got there & winked at her suddenly happy soldiers

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They got so charged-up just looking at her

They paved a crumbling rock road with asphalt

For 100 miles before lunch time & without a break

Nobody but one village urchin knows where they got the asphalt

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Then one freezing morning she & her sparse gear were gone

The outpost fell into an endless & bottomless depression

Until they found a dead Taliban with an arrow in his back

Suddenly they knew ~ the Colonel wasn’t gone at all

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Now the soldiers at this craven location pull guard duty

With smiles on their faces & joy in their hearts

‘Cuz every so often when least expected they catch a glimpse

Col. Sheena Johnson, half naked, stalking Taliban in the snarky shadows…

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(Copyright Clyde Collins 2013)

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Sheena_86c69e62

Col. Sheena Johnson, U.S. Army

The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

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