Capt’n Fiddler Parachutes Into Pluckame

Ft Benning Paratrooper Training 1951

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by Rawclyde!

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Ahhhhhhh, catapulting soaring roaring glory!

The boldness, the common sense of the U.S. Secretary of Defense!

Chuck Hagel has sold the entire U.S. Air Force’s A-10 Warthog Fleet

To the Afghan National Army for one dollar!

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With a lot of training & expensive accoutrements

Now the ANA gots its own aging, rattling, deadly air-support

This Chuck is proud of that Chuck

For doing the right Chuck Chuck thing!

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I am Capt’n Chuck Fiddler of the U.S. Army

Pulling my ripcord over the Nuristan Province of

Not Afghanistan, but Afghaneeland

A bubble full of wishful thinking inside my mind

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A tiny dumb-ass bubble that refuses to pop

But that floats like a prayer in the ethereal reaches

Of a poor old soldier’s mind, so yes

I am parachuting out of a Warthog aeroplane above Pluckame!

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Inside this strange bubble that will not stop

I’ve been training Afghan soldiers to fly

Now like a rain drop I am about to plop

At the feet of Col. Sheena Johnson

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I shall serve wherever my empress be

Be it Afghanistan & be it free

So I float from above

To back the colonel’s love!

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Yes, I float & whirl & twirl

Caught in a vortex of air swirling grand

Afghaneeland’s atmosphere gots a mind of its own

It looks like I’ll never land!!!

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Copyright Clyde Collins 2014

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by Shepard Fairey

Art by Shepard Fairey

http://www.theblackbookgallery.com/store/shepard-fairey-prints

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Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

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Capt’n Fiddler’s Afghanistan Vision

Maa Durga 5

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by Rawclyde!

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My visionary blueprint for Afghanistan

An architectural triumph of much down & dirty brooding

With Sufi flare & Hindu scare is ready now

To provide for ye people a future glowing growing & secure

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Unfortunately the Taliban are still unruly & hostile

With an Al Qaeda sense of Wahabi blood-lust & overkill

Not just toward me but everybody like me

Not just here but across this nation’s borders as well

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continued below

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oscar-olarte-ordre-et-liberte-299

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But with the imprint of Col. Sheena Johnson’s footprint

Upon the land high low & lightly wherever she go

I am able to present to you this enchanting vision

Of Afghanistan democracy meant to be & totally free

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What the Taliban sons of this awesome nation gots to do

Is lighten up, stop being so tense & mellow out

All this blatant killing has got to go

So Habibullah & Sheena can slow dance in the moon glow

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I want you all to sing scooby dooby dooo

Won’t you all bring some scooby dooby dooooo

Jus’ fling some scooby dooby dooooooo

Col. Sheena Johnson of the U.S. Army loves youuuuuuu!

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text

Copyright Clyde Collins 2014

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portrait of the captain

by

Oscar Olarte

http://macabregallery.com/en/oscar-olarte-ordre-et-liberte

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Whirling1

The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

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Capt’n Chuck Fiddler

hijaz-Ali

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by Rawclyde!

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Sunrise, sunset, I go about

My daily intrigues without too much alarm

Eating at the cafe & reading the newspaper

Squinting quizzically at the questionable clientele

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Mohawks, tattoos, loose women & barbie dolls

So much diversity in the American lifestyle

I’ll have one more cup of coffee please

Before I go to the hazy crazy valley below

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Other than a lopsided nose & a back with a bolt or two missing

I have no real problems as memories get glazed over

And war wounds hobble along in

A lovely land of free-will & democracy

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With one marble eye, one fake leg

Capt’n Chuck Fiddler, yours truly, pays the bill

takes another glance at the paper, low n’ behold

There’s Col. Sheena Johnson, so profound, so bold

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In her customary little slipping & sliding cat-hide rag

Yellow hair waving, baby blues beaming, casual stance

She’s advising native villagers in Afghanistan

in a recent photo right here in the daily paper!

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So she inexplicably shows up again

In that far away land of tremulous doubt

Where the women are rising & men kill for one sick goat

Where you’re blamed for everything as you try to help them out

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Jesus Christ & Mohammed too, have mercy on us all

I have to go back, say “hello” one last time

To she whom I have worshiped obeyed & missed my whole life long

What’s the name of the hamlet where she has appeared?

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My one good eye, it squints, it strains, line after line

Tears spill, overjoyed, I can barely see

The name of the place, I search for it exasperatingly

I wipe my eye!  I see!  The village of Pluckame!

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(Copyright Clyde Collins 2014)

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https://oldtimerchronicle2.wordpress.com/2013/10/16/afghans-fend-off-taliban-threat

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The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

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